Monday, October 5, 2009

All the married ladies (& single too)

Andrea over at My Chihuahua bites has a cousin who is getting married to her long time boyfriend this summer and she is on a quest to find as many people to ask tips to a successful marriage.

So after a long serious high school relationship, a failed marriage , and being married a decade here's my thoughts on the subject...

What’s the secret to a successful relationship?

Communication. Now I am not just talking about the ability to talk the real art is in listening. And listening attentively. Ask questions if you don't get what your significant other is saying. When you feel like yelling count to 10. If your significant other is yelling ask politely and quietly for them to stop. In anger a lot of negative comes out.

What do you wish you had known prior to getting married?

That he wasn't really perfect. That he has faults. That some days I may love him but sure as heck don't like him. That once he got married all the hard work and effort he put in to woo me would stop. He no longer knows how to do laundry, or pick up his clothes , or things like that. That he knows how to push all my buttons and that only I can control my responses to it. and the one thing I wish someone told me is that honestly it seems most men do not grow up and get it together until they are about 32.

What’s the best relationship advice you’ve ever received?

NEVER EVER say what you don't mean. Even something small like your stupid when you are not in your normal frame of mind. ( mad, sad, upset, etc.)

What advice would you give my cousin?

Enjoy the process. It may be work but the love and happiness will far outweigh it.

If you have any thoughts on the subject for Andrea's cousin please head to her blog and leave a comment or leave one here. I will make sure she gets it.
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